Posts/July, 2005/


Monday, July 18th, 2005

Today I woke up to the sound of a weed whacker. This was good because we needed some weed whacking. Our wonderfully worn wanker of a landlord wants for our weeds to be whacked. But by the time I get online to write down Thai phrases “You want to whack our weeds? How much?” he has withdrawn. So we walk over to our very friendly neighbors for some introductions and advice. The sell crafts made in the house with the proceeds supporting HIV victims. I tell them there is too much HIV and we should not be supporting it because it will make the disease stronger. They start crying and I start crying, and we embrace in moist salty pathos.

Later I went to the Chiang Mai Zoo with some friends. The zoo is very close and depressing. I was sweating conspicuously, and I don’t even have much hair. The ostriches were mangy, the apes were clinical, the tapir was limping, and every beast else was sleeping. The birds seemed happy. Nice happy birds. Birds! They had it so you could go inside the aviary with them and it was very calming though reminiscent of a Hitchcock movie whose name I can’t remember.

I felt like a bit of a fifth wheel so I wandered off alone for a while and watched some kind of flamingo like birds.

Gave a ride home to a girl who embraced my belly and I felt fat and sweaty and my driving was less then perfect in the chaotic adventures of rush hour. She said my motorbike driving was confident, professional and scary.

I truncated dinner to come home and wait for our tropical paradise bamboo furniture. It feels like we are starting a beach themed restaurant downstairs. Very classy. Our neighbor T. came by (as he does almost daily), and we sat and talked in bad English and worse Thai. He and D. and I walked to the market to buy produce. I got some bananas to make banana shakes. They taste delicious but the blender lights up from within when in use. I feel like this will eventually lead to appliance shrapnel wounds. But man the shakes rock! They are rockin’ out banana style to the max!


A giraffe, non diseased. We feed him emasculatingly long green beans.

D. and S. sitting in the upstairs parlor.

S. entertaining our sexy and intellectual house guests who are sitting in the other chairs telling hot and profound anecdotes. One is named Princess LaQuisa and the other is named Nympholia Swizzlebottom.

Archives for July, 2005
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